The old ZBT fraternity house on Union Street–now home to the Zeta sorority.
At a recent gathering of friends, many of us with college-age grandchildren, the topic of dormitory roommates came up. We had some good laughs about our own freshman-year experiences and marveled at how different the roommate selection process is these days compared to what it was like back then. Apparently social media is now integral to finding an ideal roommate “match.” Students meet and make their connections through each other’s online profiles. The hit-and-miss of matching up roommates is now eliminated, thanks to the internet. I suspect the compatibility rate is higher with this system, but I wonder if something is lost—the anticipation, maybe some coping skills, unlikely and unexpected friendships—when kids of various backgrounds are simply thrown together by the indifferent college housing lottery.
Even before heading off to college, many of us were already familiar with the roommate scenario. For me, my constant roommate was my brother Marty, older by seven years. We shared a room until he left for college. I had cabinmates at Camp Seneca during those wonderful summers from 1955 to 1957. In between there was a rain and bug-infested week sharing a tent with pimply, non-showering boy scouts in the Adirondacks. By the time I headed off to college I was already fully acclimated to sharing a small space with someone else.
Rutgers College assigned freshman roommates, so there was no say beforehand. However, by the end of the first week of orientation, I had already ousted my roommate, an engineering major who went home to his mom every weekend. He was replaced by a North Dakota fellow who only lasted one semester. Thereafter, roommate life changed for the better. During the second semester, I ended up with Jer from Teaneck, and we bunked with Kip and Norty from Kansas City at the ZBT fraternity house on 26 Union Street. There were four of us in one room, yet we all got along and remained friends for many years until Norty passed away a few years ago, and Kip moved to Austin to teach. Jer and I see each other regularly and remain the closest of friends for 50-plus years now.
I met my roommates face to face, without the benefit of social media, and ended up with lasting friends. I hope kids these days have the same luck I did.